Things I find funny: A list of 5 things every English Undergrad student should know

If your undergraduate degree in English literature is anything like mine, here are some helpful things to remember:

1.EVERY binary is a "false dichotomy"

2. There is a metaphor about patriarchy and colonialism in there somewhere, no matter what you are studying.

3. You may have heard it said that English Literature is not about memorising facts but about learning how to read, think, understand, and communicate. FALSE. When you studied this text in seminar your professor made one passing comment about the importance of the shoes being red and he or she will be really mad if you don't write that on the test.

3. Don't EVER say "I" in an essay, for some profs, but for other profs say it ALL THE TIME.

4. That is SO Post Modern! (Don't worry if you don't know what this means it will be explained to you a thousand times if you study any more recent literature)

5. Memorise a definition of the sublime, at some point most of your profs will ask what it is and everyone will shift uncomfortable except for the know it all guy because the rest of us have heard it a thousand times and still find it confusing.